Forgiveness

Back in May I shared a little bit about a broken relationship.  Things are better, but well, still broken. Except that I know my God, I would have given up.  Except that I know my God, I would have walked away.

I won’t go into gory details but suffice it to know, I am wounded.  And I think it is fair to assume the other person is wounded as well.  So as I am working through these emotions, the most exciting thing happened.  I found this priceless jewel.

Are you ready?

In Sunday school, my friend is teaching from Exodus, chapter 1.  My Bible is laying open on my lap with Genesis 50 on the left and Exodus 1 on the right.  All of a sudden I hear God whisper to me, "Do you see it?”  I thought to myself, “What should I see, God?”  He replies, “The legacy of forgiveness.”

The legacy of forgiveness.  Wow.  Tears filled my eyes and the picture comes into focus.  I see Israel as this nation, 2 million or so people living in Egypt.  Did you know that when they went to Egypt about 400 years earlier they were a family of 70?  Now, at the time of Moses they are a nation. A nation in bondage to the Egyptian Pharaoh.

But God is about to rescue them.  You see his promise to Abraham was to make Abraham's descendants too numerous to count. But God also promised that the world would be blessed through Abraham's descendants.  This blessing comes wrapped in swaddling clothes, dies on the cross for our sins, and rises again to sit at the right hand of the Father.  His name is Jesus.

God is going to preserve this nation and bring forth our Savior through the nation of Israel.  We get to experience God and know God because of this nation.  A nation that would not exist except that one page before and 400  years earlier, Joseph chose to forgive.  Joseph chose to leave a legacy of forgiveness.

Oh, Lord, that I may forgive as Joseph did. May I forgive as you do.

So, my friend, whatever comes into your life that might hurt your heart or wound your spirit I pray that you would be quick to give it to God, quick to put it behind you and especially quick to focus on the legacy of forgiveness.

Postscript 9/2/2013  As I have been contemplating this forgiveness legacy; it occured to me that offense is Satan's greatest weapon because forgiveness is God's greatest offer.  Read that again and let it sink deep into your heart.

Committment

Recently I began reading a book called What's it like to be married to me? by Linda Dallow. Actually, I am in a small group that is reading the book together as a sort of Bible study. To say the book is a challenge would be a gross understatement. While I recommend the book to every gal who is, was or intends to be married; the book is not for the faint of heart. It cuts to the core of some very real challenges we must overcome in order to make our marriages work.

At the end of the first set of assignments, there is one particular task that I really enjoyed. I finished reading the chapter just before heading to Boston for a visit. The thought of seeing all the places that were important during the birth of our nation, hearing and reading about the heros and battles, and learning about the uniqueness of the founding documents set my mind afire. So with that as the background, I dove head first into the assignment.

At the end of chapter 1, we were supposed to write a personal Marriage Purpose Statement. The intent is to think about, pray through and form a statement that could serve as a roadmap to where you want your marriage to go. The thought is that if we don't plan for success, we very well may end up with a disaster. Since I've been married almost 33 years, the following statement is more like an affirmation of where I have come from as much as it is where I want to go. The following is what I wrote.

Declaration of Commitment (an imitation of the Declaration of Independence)

When in the course of human events, it becomes necessary for this wife to strengthen the bonds which have connected her with her husband and with great respect to the opinion of God it requires that I should declare the causes which compel me to remain committed. We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all women are in need of love and all men are in need of respect, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain inalienable duties to leave their mother and father and to cleave unto one another and that to secure these duties insures the two shall become one. Marriages are instituted by God deriving their power from the Holy Spirit. And whenever a marriage becomes destructive it is the Right of the wife to alter her ways and institute new patterns which lay its foundation on biblical principles and organizing her life in such form, as to most likely effect her life for God's glory. The Almighty dictates that marriages long established should not be dissolved for light and transient causes; and accordingly all experience hath shown, that mankind are more disposed to suffer, while evil behavior prevails. But when a long train of changes persist pursuing the same Object, God, they shall produce a design which reduces the chance of separation. Such has been the patient experience of this wife. The history of and with the present Patriarch of the Arebalo Family is a history of mistakes, grace, love and commitment all having a direct effect on this woman's life. To prove this, let the evidence of our 33rd anniversary be submitted to a candid world.

I would also add that inspite of the challenges, a life with this man as we pursue God together has been worth every minute. And I would say to those who are in a hard place right now, seek first the kingdom of God and remain committed.

Why

On March 16^th, my son was driving a 2011 Civic and was broadsided by an Infinti traveling 60mph.  The driver’s door and my son took the full impact of the collision.  His car then crossed three lanes of oncoming traffic and hit a concrete wall head on.  By all accounts, the impact should have broken his neck and caused his death.  When we found him alive with only minor injuries there was great joy.  Our family praised our God on high for sparing his life.  Nevertheless, the question remains…why did Mark survive when so many die in similar accidents?

The answers to life’s questions must come from the Author of life.  If my car vibrates, the machine at Firestone aligns my wheels.  If the pictures on my walls are crooked, the laser level reveals the problem.  If I want to put a fence on the property line, a surveyor will measure the boundaries.  In the same way, scripture is a plumb line that separates truth from fiction.  All my thinking must line up with scripture or else it is at risk of being incorrect, mixed up and askew.

Answers to life are incomplete if we do not know God. We look to scripture to learn about God because God has chosen to reveal aspects of Himself to us through the Bible and the person of Jesus Christ, His Son. We cannot take one characteristic of God and isolate it or elevate it apart from the rest.  People like to focus on God’s love and grace without calculating His holiness or justice.  We must keep in mind that there is harmony in the way scripture reveals the nature of God.  We must consider the entirety of His Being and not simply focus on a few of His perfections.  I am not a Bible scholar; I’m only a Bible student.  I have not had any formal training; I only try to walk with Him daily.

It is interesting that people call Christianity a religion.  At its very heart that is not true.  Christianity is a relationship with the one, true God.  Religion says, “Man is bad, now work to make yourself approved by God.”  Christianity says, “God loves man so much that God came to man and has paid the penalty for your sin.” 

Religion says, “There are no guarantees.”  But Romans 10:9-10 is one of God’s guarantees.  It says, “If you declare with your mouth, “Jesus is Lord,” and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved. For it is with your heart that you believe and are justified, and it is with your mouth that you profess your faith and are saved.

So what does Scripture say about God?  He is in perfection:

·         Eternal and Immutable

·         Omnipresent, Omnipotent, & Omniscient

·         Sovereign and Holy

·         Righteous and Just

·         Good and Merciful

·         Love and Truth

And in all these things He is Wise.  Therefore, I can trust Him.  I can trust His love and His goodness even when things go wrong.  I can trust His sovereignty and justice even when I am wronged.  I can trust His grace and mercy even when I am wrong and need forgiveness.

When life is a mystery and everything around me seems in turmoil, when I do not understand how or why, I know I can trust in God because He knows the reasons why.  Habakkuk the prophet from the Old Testament penned these beautiful words in chapter 3, verses 17-18

Though the fig tree does not bud
    and there are no grapes on the vines,
though the olive crop fails
    and the fields produce no food,
though there are no sheep in the pen
    and no cattle in the stalls,
yet I will rejoice in the Lord,
    I will be joyful in God my Savior.

It is with great confidence that I place my trust in God.  Not because of what I’ve done or my circumstances but because of who He is.

He is. 

He just is.

Offended

For quite a number of years, there has been a major fracture in the relationship between a close family member and me.  In the midst of grief, we said many sad and hurtful things.  As a believer I failed to be like Christ on many levels.  And while I could justify my behavior in every way, the truth is I was wrong.

You see, it doesn't matter what was done to me.  My model is Christ.  He stood before his accusers and remained silent....not just to fulfill scripture but because it is what the Father asked him to do.  God's ways are higher than my ways.  (Isaiah 55:8)  He is asking me to trust him because he works all things together for good because I love him. (Romans 8:28)  God has made it clear to me that I am to stop reacting to the offense and start responding to my offender with love.

So the choice before me is to remain offended or I can work at reconciliation.  I can allow myself to grow bitter and angry or I can let the peace of Christ rule in my heart.   I can go around justifying myself or trust God with my reputation.

I will not be easily offended because I am not defined by anyone's opinion of me.  I am defined by who God says I am.  His word says in Ephesians 1: 3-7 that I am blessed, chosen, holy and loved, adopted as His, shed with grace and redeemed.  I can rest in The Lord because He is my Rock and my Salvation, whom shall I fear?  He is the Stronghold of my life, of whom shall I be afraid? (Psalm 27:1) 

So, in light of that knowledge, how am I supposed to act?  I am to Love The Lord my God with all my heart and Love my neighbor as myself.  God's definition of love can be found in 1 Corinthians 13.

I don't think it is our job to restore relationships.  Only God can do that.  Our job is to love....by being patient and kind, by not being envious or boastful or proud, by not dishonoring others but seeking what is best for others, by not getting angry easily or keeping a record, by rejoicing in the truth not delighting in evil, and also to protect and trust others and to hope for and persevere with others.

I am to "act justly, love mercy and walk humbly with God."  (Micah 6:8) Mercy is:  not giving my offender what they deserve.  Loving mercy, however, goes a step further by also giving the offender what they don't deserve: grace and forgiveness.  Walking humbly means not demanding my own way but rather giving up my right to be right.  These are my directives from on High.

As I'm typing this I realize that I am more prone to protecting myself than my offender.  What about you? What will you allow God to change in you?  Father God, I pray you will give me courage and strength to protect those who offend me.  Give me eyes to see them in the light of your love.  In Jesus' name, Amen!

Reality

Recently, I posted the following comment on face book: "We only see appearances; God sees reality." One of the responses I received was a question about what do I think God sees. Here are my thoughts on the matter.

We only see appearances. Often times we endure circumstances that seem impossible or encounter situations that appear insurmountable or receive news that rocks our faith to the very core. As we walk through those days we all too often look only at the obstacle. But even when we have a great faith in God, we still cannot see into the future or know how things are working together. Sometimes it takes years to learn the why of a certain circumstance. And often we never learn....this side of eternity.

Let's look at some examples from scripture where real people encountered real challenges. I want to start with one of my favorites: Joseph. The stories about Joseph are found in the end of Genesis. He is the son of Jacob and grandson of Abraham. His heritage is faith. But Joseph was an arrogant young boy and his brothers had it up to their eyeballs with his pride. Thinking he needed to be brought down a notch or two, they made arrangements to "get rid of him." But God saw Joseph's potential. It appeared that Joseph was about to die, but God saw the reality of Joseph's rescue. It appeared Joseph would spend the rest of his life in prison, but God saw how prison was shaping and humbling Joseph's heart. It appeared that Joseph would rise to power in Egypt to save the Egyptians, but God saw that through Joseph He would save the nation of Israel. I love what Joseph says to his brothers in Genesis 50:20, "You intended to harm me, but God intended it for good to accomplish what is now being done, the saving of many lives." Joseph saw reality.

Another favorite of mine would be a man named Mordecai.  Mordecai was the cousin of a young orphaned Jewish girl named Esther.  You can read about Mordecai in the book of Esther.  Mordecai was a man who worshipped and honored God.  Esther 3:1-5 tells us that even with his life on the line, Mordecai would not bow to anyone but God.  The book may be named after the Queen, but Mordecai is the hero.  He listens and obeys God so he can counsel Esther with divine wisdom.  It appeared that Esther was in great danger as she was carried off to the king's harem, but God saw the plan to rescue her.  It appeared Haman's plot to destroy the Jews would succeed, but God saw the king's love for Esther.  It appeared Esther would lose courage, but God saw that through Esther he would save the nation of Israel.  I love what Mordecai tells Esther in chapter 4:13-14.  He says, “Do not think that because you are in the king’s house you alone of all the Jews will escape. For if you remain silent at this time, relief and deliverance for the Jews will arise from another place, but you and your father’s family will perish. And who knows but that you have come to royal position for such a time as this?” Mordecai saw reality.

We too have the choice to either fix our eyes on the obstacle or see Reality.  In John 14:6 Jesus declares, "I am the way, the truth, and the light."  Our obstacles remain obstacles unless they are viewed in the light of God's word.  Ephesians 2:20 states that Jesus is the chief cornerstone.  Nothing makes sense unless it is lined up with God's word.  So whatever you are facing, whether big or small, I encourage you to look past your circumstance into the word of God.  What does He see?  What does God say?  Line up your thoughts and actions with the plumb line of Jesus Christ and He will give you eyes to see reality.